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Fic: Always a Bit Left Over

Title: Always a Bit Left Over
Rating: G
Word Count: 300
Warnings: Offscreen violence
Characters: Amy, Rory, the Doctor (eleventh)
Summary: From tumblrite laurelhach: "
Headcanon: the ‘popcorn’ button on the tardis microwave causes all corn within a two mile radius to violently explode."

Author's note: Unbetaed and written on the spur of the moment because the-last-teabender wrote this, and I am apparently incapable of seeing something like that and not wanting to riff on it myself.  So, here we are.

Thud.  Thud.

“Why did you push the popcorn button?”  The Doctor skidded around the console, staying upright by some mixture of flapping arms and divine intervention.  “You weren’t supposed to push the popcorn button!”

“Forget about your stupid popcorn button, my husband is concussed!”

“Because you pushed the popcorn button!”

Thud.  Thud.

Rory raised his hand politely.  “Um, just to clarify …”

“She pushed the popcorn button!” the Doctor told him.

Thud.  Thud.  “Come on out, you alien cowards!”  Thud.

“And it wasn’t actually snowing out there?  I’m a bit disoriented here, and I didn’t see much before someone hit me on the head with a shovel.”

“The popcorn setting,” the Doctor said, “has some minor calibration issues, which wouldn’t even be an issue outside of,” he checked a readout, “Iowa, and definitely wouldn’t be an issue if people didn’t press it!” He pulled the dematerialization lever with the air of an argument won.  The thudding faded.

“Calibration issue,” Amy repeated.

“A minor calibration issue.  Probably a fault of the model.  Every time I take it apart, I find extra bits.”

“This,” Amy shook the bag, “is not a minor calibration issue!”

Rory focused on the bag, with some difficulty.

Pristine, perfectly unpopped popcorn kernels, golden-brown.  He reached out, curious.  The bag was completely cool to the touch.

“It’s—“  The Doctor appeared to examine and discard several different inadequate adjectives.  “Technical.”


“Very, very technical.  Difficult to explain.”

Amy folded her arms.  “Try.”

Actually being able to see the icicles dripping off that word balloon, Rory diagnosed, was probably not a good sign, since people didn’t have word-balloons outside of that HeroWorld simulation which had nearly killed him several times and proved conclusively that a Doctor with the power of flight was more frightening than a supervillain.  “Um, about my head …”

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OMG!! I read the one suggested and it was hilarious! Then...I read yours. OMFG. Is it bad that I can see it?! IS THAT BAD?!

Now I wanna see the HeroWorld simulation. Like burning. I neeeeeeed it.

'I find extra bits'

OMFG...can he just...NOT. Ever?! I lie. I love it when he does that, lol!

Thank you for this! Thank you!


Oh, it gets better. From bright-coat-and-bravado, we have this:

I am part of a phenomenon here. Will we find out that part of the farmer's ire at aliens is because this has happened more than once, and last time he distinctly heard someone referred to as a Space Idiot? Is a microwave included in Jamie's ever-expanding definition of the word "beastie?" Should we ship Adric/popcorn OTP? I can't wait to find out.

And I'm so glad you liked my story! *HUGS*

Eeee!! The fun just keeps coming, lol!!

LOL! There should be a list of epic microwave disasters...a LIST.

How can I not?! You bring badass and awesomeness every time. It is truly a pleasure to read your I plan to keep doing that. :D

LOL! I literally LOL'ed at the Iowa line. Too funny!


You should know that as of this morning, there's another one on tumblr:

I have no idea where this will end, and I'm loving it.

" and proved conclusively that a Doctor with the power of flight was more frightening than a supervillain."

LOL!! That's brilliant! That's a story I'd like to see.

And, naturally there's a "trick" to using the Doctor's microwave. I'm convinced that's why nobody else can fly the Tardis (generally) is not because it's hard to fly, but because, like any old broke down and jury rigged machine, there's a "trick" to it.

*g* I am honestly not sure if I can do Flying!Superhero!Doctor justice, so if anyone else wants to take a stab at it, I'll . . . be watching from over here. Waaaay over here. From a safe distance.

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

AHAHAHAHA Oh my god.

Is it bad I can so see a years-later sort of thing with 12 putting his hand into a coat pocket and bringing out some stray popcorn like 'The HELL?' and then laughing his arse off because he remembered?

Oh, not bad at all! I'm glad you enjoyed it! (Sort of raises questions about whether the pockets in the Doctor's various outfits are all the same dimensional whatsy-thingy, but I see no reason why they shouldn't be—and plenty of comedic reasons why they should.)

(Why not? He seems to ALWAYS have his screwdriver which just appears for no reason so it makes sense that stuff that gets into the TARDIS could end up in his pocket if small enough.

It makes a lot of sense that way, I think. And he also pulls out some truly random objects, like yo-yos.

Yeah, I think so to. ... Might have to write 12 and the magic popcorn appearance one day.

Great, now I want popcorn *lol* Great fic :) <3

Edited at 2015-01-10 03:32 pm (UTC)

You're probably safe, so long as no aliens have disassembled your microwave . . . glad you liked! *g*

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